Walking the Ancient Paths

And finally, for random silliness and/or clever story lines, the following punctuation submissions earn 5 points in the Quarantine Cup. Thanks for making grammar truly entertaining! Though some of you seriously concern me... 😄 😬 He walked into the restaurant and sat down--the menu had the all-important fat-free           plant based vegetarian burger. The manager [Lettuce B. Vegetarian] told me they were a different type of restaurant. The ingredients were plants (potato, beetroot, and asparagus). 😱 Joey ate a fishhook, a glow stick, and a banana peel. The peel made him sick, so he took some pills. The pills, he claims, gave him a headache. His symptoms were: headache, nausea, stomach pain, and green skin. He went online with one goal: to find a cure. His search prevailed; he aimed a fire hydrant and shot it up his nose. It didn’t work -- it made him feel sicker -- so he threw it at the wall. The wall imploded, and his twenty-eight pound bath tub ca...

The following sets of punctuation mark submissions are each worth 4 points in the Quarantine Cup Tournament, mainly due to the subject matter and clever use of story line! Again, color of the text indicates the color of the team): I put flour, chocolate chips, and eggs in the chocolate chip cookies. The cookies weren’t ready yet, so I put them back in the oven. The cookies, which were warm and gooey, were finally ready. I did everything that I needed to to prepare for the baking: put my hair up, put on an apron, and have all of the ingredients.  Cookie making is not for everyone: they have to know what they are doing and not burn the cookies! The cookies that I made were perfect; they had the right amount of crunch.  I went to get the cookies out of the oven-- and I froze. I made twenty-four cookies. She [Jaclyn] made the best cookies in the world.  Jaclyn Brouwer (2006-present) made amazing chocolate chip cookies. To make ch...

Who knew punctuation could be so funny? Thank you, Eighth Graders, for continuing to entertain me! The color of the text indicates the color of the Quarantine Cup Team. Today's submissions are worth one point each in the randomly funny category: Use a comma to set off a dependent clause: When Mrs. Amen screamed, I jumped almost out of my seat. Use a colon to signal that a list is coming: I like kicking, throwing, and jumping on watermelons.  Here’s what I need: a couple of Doritos, some Chicken tenders, and a Dr. Pepper. He packed things including: an appetite, an attitude, and clothes. Use a colon to signal that an explanation is coming: Food makes be feels good: there isn’t that much to explain other than I’m hungry I am taking this watermelon for an experiment: throwing it off a roof. We need new pipes: our old ones are leaking and now I have to swim out of my room. Well at least I get my daily exercise. Use a semicolon to join two independent cla...

(Because we can always use a good scream!) Many more screams to come!